“A new poll out today shows that 22 percent of voters strongly approve of the job President Obama is doing, 43 percent strongly disapprove of the job he’s doing, and the other 35 percent are holding off judgment until he actually does something.” — Jay Leno
“President Obama hosted the Alabama Crimson Tide football team at the White House. At one point, the quarterback threw a football to Obama, which was the first time during his presidency that anything’s gotten passed.” — Jimmy Fallon
Former Rep. Eric Massa, D-N.Y., “admits to groping, fondling and tickling. And I’m thinking, why isn’t this guy governor of New York?” — David Letterman
