Dubious, bogus and utterly phony headlines

spoofslogo.jpgThe following satirical headlines come from borowitzreport.com:

OBAMA CALLS PLAGIARISM FLAP ‘BEST OF TIMES, WORST OF TIMES’; Tells Hillary: ‘Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner’

ROGER CLEMENS NAMED NEW WHITE HOUSE SPOKESPERSON; Bush Impressed By Pitcher’s Performance Before Congress

HILLARY SELLS OWN TEARS ON EBAY; ‘Hail Mary’ for Cash-strapped Campaign

OBAMA WINS COUNTRY MUSIC ENTERTAINER OF THE YEAR; Extends Amazing String of Victories

DEMOCRATIC RACE POSES CHALLENGE FOR RACISTS, SEXISTS; Nowhere to Turn, Disgruntled Haters Say

FACEBOOK TO CO-SPONSOR WAR ON TERROR; Popular Networking Site Takes Aim at Jihad

HUCKABEE ASKS JESUS TO STIMULATE ECONOMY; Loaves, Fishes Key to Package

Posted by Phillip Brownlee

6 Comments

  1. Regular
    Posted February 22, 2008 at 8:08 am | Permalink

    PHILLIP BROWNLEE FIRED FROM EDITORIAL BOARD FOR WRITING AN OBJECTIVE ARTICLE - In a rare twist of journalistic prose, Brownlee was fired from the Wichita Eagle for offering the whole truth on a subject concerning politics. The Publisher stated emphatically that “We can have the truth printed here, the Public cannot stand the truth!”

  2. Regular
    Posted February 22, 2008 at 8:10 am | Permalink

    OBAMA DENIES PLAGIARISM CHARGES - Senator Barak Obama stated today that “in the beginning” we he created the “heavens and the earth” in the void, all words came from him (Obama) and the word was good.

  3. Ben
    Posted February 22, 2008 at 8:13 am | Permalink

    “LEGISLATURE DECLARES THAT SALT WATER PLUME IN EQUSS BEDS IS NOT POLLUTION”

    Huelskamp, Neufeld and Morris note that salt is found in nature and is essential to oceanic life - therefore it is good to have in the groundwater. “I have a tropical fish at home and he loves salt water” says one of the legislators.

  4. Regular
    Posted February 22, 2008 at 8:14 am | Permalink

    SENATOR HILLARY CLINTON’S CAMPAIGN GETS HUGE INFUSION OF CAMPAIGN CASH - In other news, the New York Senator announced the opening of Chinese electronic factories in her state. She also stated that massive funds have been donated to local Universities and local 501C organizations aligned with seeking “Democratic” causes.

  5. Regular
    Posted February 22, 2008 at 8:18 am | Permalink

    MCCAIN ADMITS TO STEROID USE - In a shocking admission, Senator McCain announced that his use of certain anabolic steroids and human growth hormone was indeed true. McCain said he needed the extra boost to compete against younger political competition.

  6. george
    Posted February 22, 2008 at 9:06 am | Permalink

    Eagle you are talking about the do no wrong of liberal journalists here. The press can’t do anything right or is it wrong. Leading headlines help sells papers I guess. Just don’t kill the goose that laid the golden egg, maybe you all have already.

3 Trackbacks

  1. By Media Districts Entertainment Blog » Dubious, bogus and utterly phony headlines on February 22, 2008 at 6:27 am

    [...] WE Blog » The Wichita Eagle Editorial Department Blog added an interesting post on Dubious, bogus and utterly phony headlinesHere’s a small excerpt [...]

  2. By Facebook » Dubious, bogus and utterly phony headlines on February 22, 2008 at 7:32 am

    [...] Louiza’s blog wrote an interesting post today on Dubious, bogus and utterly phony headlinesHere’s a quick excerptNowhere to Turn, Disgruntled Haters Say. FACEBOOK TO CO-SPONSOR WAR ON TERROR; Popular Networking Site Takes Aim at Jihad… [...]

  3. By Ebay India on March 5, 2008 at 12:28 am

    Ebay India…

    An interesting point of view. A little bit different from my way of thinking but nevertheless a good comment….