The following satirical news story comes from borowitzreport.com:
“Just hours after former Vice President Al Gore received the Nobel Peace Prize for his efforts on global warming, the U.S. Supreme Court handed Gore a stunning reversal, stripping him of his Nobel and awarding it to President George W. Bush instead. . . .
“In a 5-4 decision, the justices made it clear that they had taken the unprecedented step of stripping Mr. Gore of his Nobel because President Bush deserved it more.
“’It is true that Al Gore has done a lot of talking about global warming,’ wrote Justice Antonin Scalia, for the majority. ‘But President Bush has actually helped create global warming.”’
Posted by Phillip Brownlee
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33 Comments
Gore is a talker, Bush is a doer!
Hysterical.
History will not be nice to Bush. Perhaps as unfriendly as his domestic and foreign policies.
The legends of Bushies will be a footnote in his legacy of disaster after disaster not the least being the delivery of the election by the Supreme Court.
Our population is hungry and homeless in increasing numbers and our global friends are well, no longer our friends.
Shameful.
PRESIDENT BUSH SHOWS HE IS A READING PRESIDENT!At a news conference Bush explains he has borrowed VP Cheney’s copies of “Mein Kampf”, Herman Goering’s “ The media in modern times and how to bring the country to another World war” and the “Communist Manifesto”. Reading them cover to cover and with VP Cheney’s help understands how they can be the best directions for the United States.
The Democratic Congress voted in the majority for these actions with a Bipartisan qualm of Republicans. The Weekly Standard, Wall street Journal and the American Spectator and hailed the new direction the country was going. While Move-on. Org put a cheesy picture of Bush with a Hitler style mustache on its cover and the transvestite who wears a Pink hat and dress was put on the cover of VOGUE.
When asked for a comment on the current crisis in the United States. Captain America and Kansas said “MY TOY…. MY TOY!”, then fell on the floor kicking and screaming.
When asked for a comment, WriterDog said, “It appears I was a bit rash trading off my MAC 90 for that cheap knock off of a Les Paul Guitar that I never play!”.
Seeing the end times are near, Nathan and JR joined hands and song “Komby-ya” .Meanwhile in a remote village somewhere in the Afghanistan/ Pakistan region Bin Laden is quoted as saying to his followers, “See I told you there was no reason to attack America again!”.
Bush deserves it more than Gore.
PELOSI INTRODUCES ADDITIONAL INSULT RESOLUTIONS
Following up on her Turkish genocide resolution which had offended a key allie, Ms. Pelosi today introduced bills calling Pope Benedict XVI a “washed up old Nazi”, the English Queen mother, “a dour pickle in a silly hat”, and Senate leader Harry Reid, “a big woos”.
Pelosi intimated that the press could expect another resolution, this one targeting Democrat Senator Hillary Clinton, who Ms. Pelosi stated was; “deceptive as a Media Matters press release”.
Good Job Philip!This was hilarious. I like getting my day started with a good guffaw.
“Rush Limbaugh throws Tiny Tim and Family Out of Tenement Housing for Christmas.”
GORE AWARDED ADDITIONAL HONORS
Accolades continued to pour in for Gore, who had won the Noble “Peace” Prize for his movie on the subject of global warming.
Mr. Gore was given awards for: Best Director, Best Rock Album, Best Actress in a Comedy, Best Costume, and Best Foreign Language Film.
KILLER “PRETZEL” STALKS BUSH
In a repeat of an earlier incident, President Bush today again nearly “choked” on a “pretzel,” said White House Spokeswoman Dana Perino. The “choking” followed media reports of the President’s declining approval ratings, and media figures speculated that the President had taken to consuming large quantities of “pretzels” as an effort at self-medicating.
The Libs only recognize the authority of the US Supreme Court when their rulings suit their interests.
Roe v Wade is great!
The Bush/Gore ruling is not.
Sour grapes.
Most people do not rest their opinion of ‘good or bad’ court decision solely on the authority of the court. Thinking people like to read the case, the arguement, and the opinion of the court to see if it fits the facts.
Brian, I didn’t say people had to agree with the US Supreme Court, just recognize their authority.
And in this case with a very tight national election, the Supreme Court had the authority.
To claim that Bush stole the election is to say that the US Supreme Court had no legal authority in this case.
How about if we just recognize that when Bush didn’t want his opponent to have the right to request a recount he turned to activist judges?
“Brian, I didn’t say people had to agree with the US Supreme Court, just recognize their authority.
And in this case with a very tight national election, the Supreme Court had the authority.
To claim that Bush stole the election is to say that the US Supreme Court had no legal authority in this case.
Posted by: Max | October 22, 2007 at 09:58 AM”
I do not disagree with you. I understand that the court has the authority to make various decisions, and that those decisions would and should be enforceable.
However, I do reserve the right to examine their decisions and decide for myself whether I think they made the right decision or not. I think all of us would do good to do the same.
What about the authority of the Florida supreme court in the matter there Maxie? Power being reserved to the individual states and such?
Ah but this is supposed to be a headline thread.
DEFECTIVE HUMOR GENE FOUND!
Following recent discoveries that the brains of conservatives and liberals are biologically different, scientists today posit that there is a “humor gene”. In tests, the gene was found defective in those of a confessed conservative belief while the gene is fullly funtioning in self called liberals.
CONSERVATIVES CONSISTENT
except when they are not.
“DEFECTIVE HUMOR GENE FOUND!…Posted by: J R | October 22, 2007 at 10:32 AM ”
Ummmm…..
I don’t get it
Max,
If you think the U.S. Supreme Court has the legal authority to select U.S. Presidents, you may want to review the doctrine of the separation of powers. The selection of Presidents is a political matter, not a legal one.
More to the point, what kind of legitimate ruling is issued with the caveat that “our consideration is limited to the present circumstances?” If the Supreme Court isn’t making legal precedent with their decisions, what are they doing?
So, yeah. Liberals accept the legal decisions of the Supreme Court; it’s the political ones we have a problem with. Like when a “conservative” majority on the SCOTUS throws stare decisis under the bus in order to install their preferred candidate.
A special case ruling that determines an election, does not seem like democracy to me. If they didn’t want to have an entire recount, they should have ordered a re-vote. Left democracy to the voters.
BUSH FINDS Iarqi WMD AT 2008 RADIO AND TELEVISION CORRESPONDENTS’ DINNER
In an incredible coincidence, President Bush today located missing Iraqi weapons of mass destruction (WMD) under a banquet table at the 2008 Radio and Televsion Correspondents’ Dinner, after having joked about not finding them during the 2004 Dinner.
“Mah administration will leave no stone–I mean, table–unturned in th’ effort to get the terris’ts,” a bleary eyed, slurring, and stumbling President Bush announced to the astonished audience.
White House Press Secretary Dana Pernino later tried to quell reports that Bush had been seen drinking heavily prior to the dinner. She had no answer, however, to charges that First Lady Laura Bush’s wooden gestures and pasted-on smile were the result of Xanax.
Ack. ‘Iarqi?’ No. ‘IRAQI.’
LIBERALS LOOK TO THE FUTURE
“No really, we are looking to the future”, we have lots of ideas, said Democrat representative I. R. Petty. “Just as soon as we settle with Ralph Nader, the Supreme Court, the Swift
Boaters, the Republican House who impeached Clinton, and of course George W. Bush…
Ok CF,
What was the legal precedent for Roe v Wade?
CONSERVATIVES DEFEND THE CONSTITUTION AGAINST ‘UNITARY EXECUTIVE’ PRESIDENCY
In advance of the swearing in President-elect Hillary Clinton, minority Congressional Republicans today urged the removal of the President’s right to issue signing statements, the President’s right to wiretap without a warrant, and the President’s right to decide the final interpretation of the Constitution–rights that it had granted the Presidency during the two terms of President George Bush.
“We just don’t think it’s right for a Chief Executive to have whatever tools they ask for just handed over to them by the Legislative Branch of government,” Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell said today. “And with us Republicans on watch, you can be sure we’ll use every tool at our disposal to keep the Presidency from growing out of control.”
Max,
NOT. THE. ISSUE. The question is, going forward, the legal precedent ESTABLISHED by the ruling. Like it or hate it, Roe v. Wade wasn’t passed with the stipulation that it was not meant to serve as precedent. Bush v. Gore was. And this is why it doesn’t pass the smell test.
How can a Supreme Court decision NOT serve as precedent for subsequent law, and still be considered legitimate?
Razzy award for worst performance goes to G W Bush for his performance in Fahrenheit 9/11. “His portrayal of a president was so abysmal as to be totally unbelievable” say critics.
“His portrayal of a president was so abysmal as to be totally unbelievable” say critics.
Ben- Sounds like a normal day at the White House! (Unfortunately)
The “wound” that never heals…the GORACLE failure to get elected in 2000.
Salt anyone?
Well life is unfair… get use to it!
Gore is definately more nobel of the two.
With all of the bush crimes, he’ll have to make his presidential pardons pre-emptive, before they are ever fully investigated.
Typical stupid thread.. like there isn’t enough to talk about, the opinion editor comes up with a fake headline to talk about. must be a slow day on bash republican day they have to make up a fake headline to make them look bad..
lean left much, Phillip
Hey back off of Phillip, you try doing his job!
GRRRR!!