WICHITA LEGISLATIVE DELEGATION OFFERS IDEAS FOR VOTERS WANTING TO BUY LUNCH ACCESS; Options Include Banquet, Buffet and Express Drive-through
BIN LADEN, AL-ZARHAWI ADMIT TO ‘BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN’ RELATIONSHIP; ‘It Gets Lonely Hiding in the Hills,’ Says Terror Chief in Latest Tape
MINNESOTA DEVELOPERS BUY CITY HALL; Underused Building Will Be Another Loft Conversion
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BIN LADEN, AL-ZARHAWI ADMIT TO ‘BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN’ RELATIONSHIP; ‘It Gets Lonely Hiding in the Hills,’ Says Terror Chief in Latest TapeLater Bin Laden retract statement, :”We did not have a relationship, it is just cold in them there hills!”
BUSH RETALIATES AGAINT LIBERALS CALLING FOR INVESTIGATION INTO MISUSE OF WIRETAPS:”I HAVE YOUR PHONE NUMBERS”, HE STATES.In other related news, Liberals asking for Indian assistance in learning smoke signals.
Wichita Police fire on suspect and ACTUALLY hit him.
Wichita Police fire on suspect and ACTUALLY hit him.
BILL O’REILLEY REVISES CHILDREN’S BOOK
Adds a chapter on the “no no” of unwanted phone sex
ED FRIEDMAN AND IAN SANTIAGO SEEN IN SAME ROOM TOGETHER!
ED FRIEDMAN AND IAN SANTIAGO SEEN MELDING INTO ONE PERSON. IT CALLS ITSELF “SUPER XXX”!
In a related story, the old XXX retires and starts teaching yoga to terrorists whose belts failed to explode.
WICHITA EAGLE ANNONCES INTENTION TO DO IN DEPTH SERIES ON TRUE COST OF THIRD WORLD IMMIGRATION AND THE REAL EXTEN OF MINORITY ON WHITE CRIME.
IN OTHER NEWS IT WAS ANNOUNCED THAT HELL HAS FROZEN OVER!
XXX ARESTED FOR CUTTING JM WALKER’S GUITAR STRINGS (ALL OF EM).
IN HISTORIC ROUT, REPUBLICANS WIN ALL ELECTIONS IN EVERY CONTEST
Computerized voting working “flawlessly,” says Republican chairman
BUSH TEAM HIRES “SGT. SCHULTZ” AS NEW SPOKESMAN
“I know nushing, NUSHING,” he says in response to all reporters’ questions.
BUSH DAUGHTERS ENLIST FOR FRONT LINE COMBAT
“We want to achieve something our father never did,” says Jenna.
XXX ARRESTED FOR FAILING TO SPELL “ARRESTED” CORRECTLY.
In a related incident, J M Walker buys new guitar strings at WalMart for a discount price. XXX, in a fit of rage, gnaws on terrorists belt, but fails to explode it.
Wichita runs out of lipstick for its self
XXX has fit when he finds out he could have been buying discount strings at WalMart.
DEMOCRATIC LEADERSHIP BEGINS TALK ON STRATEGY TO BLOCK ALITO NOMINATION
In a related story, it’s too late!
WHITE HOUSE OUTRAGE!Mc Clellan: “New Curious Goerge “movie” obvious liberal attack.”
Outlander, I am howling. That is really funny.
KANSASFARMGRRL FLAMES OUT, RETURNS TO GREEN ACRES
“I was trying to cover every topic and it became too much for me. At least the cows think like I want them to” said the obviously tired and cranky blogger.
CITY ANNOUNCES DOWNTOWN ARENA PARKING SOLUTION
Plan would establish shuttle service from the soon to be underused Kansas Coliseum parking lot. Outside the news conference, enterprising Park City mayor Dee Stuart announced establishment of entertainment district to serve shuttle customers.
DEMOCRATS FORM FIRING SQUAD
find out too late they assembled in a circle
ED FRIEDMAN ABDUCTED BY MOSSAD ON THE WAY TO IRANIAN HOLOCAU$T CONFERENCE! ISRAELI PROSECUTOR INSISTS THAT TRUTH WILL BE NO DEFENSE DURING TRIAL TO PUNISH FRIEDMAN FOR CRIMES AGAINST THE JEW WORLD ORDER