Dubious, bogus and utterly phony headlines

The following satirical headlines come from borowitzreport.com:

SANTORUM BACKS BAN ON GAY WESTERNS; Golden Globes Win for ‘Brokeback Mountain’ Irks Pennsylvania Senator

SEN. BIDEN PRODUCING DANGEROUSLY HIGH LEVELS OF CARBON DIOXIDE; Talkative Lawmaker Creating Environmental Threat, Scientists Fear

DELAY PROPOSES SENDING ABRAMOFF TO PLUTO; Would Become First Disgraced Lobbyist in Space

BUSH CALLS ‘OPERATION ALIENATE PAKISTAN’ A SUCCESS; Airstrike Succeeded in Pissing Off Nation of 162,000,000, President Says
Posted by Phillip Brownlee

7 Comments

  1. Ian Santiago
    Posted January 21, 2006 at 1:45 pm | Permalink

    BLACH HITORY MONTH SHORTENED TO FIVE MINUTES, AND STILL TOO LONG AT THAT.

  2. damoon
    Posted January 21, 2006 at 4:34 pm | Permalink

    Ian, What’s BLACH HITORY?!?

  3. Ian Santiago
    Posted January 21, 2006 at 5:13 pm | Permalink

    Black History month, same thing.

  4. J R
    Posted January 22, 2006 at 9:47 pm | Permalink

    “Compassionate Conservatives” apologize for oxymoron. Cite actions as evidence real philosophy.

    “We meant that we were conservatively compassionate”

  5. J R
    Posted January 22, 2006 at 9:56 pm | Permalink

    “Compassionate Conservatives” apologize for oxymoron. Cite actions as evidence real philosophy.

    “We meant that we were conservatively compassionate”

  6. Steven E.
    Posted January 23, 2006 at 9:11 am | Permalink

    HURICAINES “GREED” AND “FEAR” FORCE OIL PRICES HIGHER

    Bush/Cheney, surprisingly, remain silent on these disasters

  7. ProudLib
    Posted January 23, 2006 at 10:51 am | Permalink

    KSU Update: BUSH ADMITS LYING US INTO WAR IN IRAQ–Sobbing President Rushed Offstage by Astonished Handlers